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Years ago I worked at a hospice and palliative care nursing home where one of my patients was a young man in his twenties who had lymphoma. Despite his pain and the tubes and bags he had to manage, he never complained.
One day, I asked him if there was anything I could do to improve his life, and he told me he always wanted a Ford F-150 truck. I made a call to a local Ford dealership and arranged for him to take a ride in one. While we were on the drive, he asked me, “Do you have any money?” It surprised me, as he had never really asked me for anything.
But he was serious. He wanted to eat lunch at the McDonald’s we were about to pass. We went in, ordered combo meals (including the upsized chocolate shake he requested), then sat at a booth and chowed down. On the way out, he asked for another large shake to go, which I gladly ordered for him.
Another person living at the same home was a lady dying from colon cancer. One day on my way out to lunch, I asked if she wanted me to bring her back a slice of pizza, or a donut.
Her smile was priceless when she opened the Krispy Kreme bag I handed to her when I returned. It wasn’t a cure in the typical sense, but it was the best treatment I could think of at the time.
Just kibbitzing with someone in the course of conversation can be therapeutic for both patient and doctor. This young lady came into my office for the first time, and after a bit she commented that I had good bedside manner. I told her I had never been to her bedside. Without hesitation, she said “You can come anytime!”
There are endless possibilities in how we can help others in need, limited only by our interest, empathy, ability to listen, sense of humor and creativity. One clear measure of success is simply the smile you can bring to someone’s face.
